January 2022 - Sparks and Roses

15 Ways to Learn to Love Yourself

Loving yourself is the best thing you can do for your life. If you want to reach your full potential and be happy and confident, it’s important to learn self-love.

Here’re 15 ways to learn to love yourself:

Stop trying to be perfect

So many people are trying to have a perfect life. But, the truth is, perfection is a myth and it’s impossible to reach. The good news is, it doesn’t matter – you’re amazing as you are!

Practice gratitude

Showing gratitude every day can help you be more loving towards yourself and others. Start a gratitude journal or blog to show how grateful you are for the positive things in your life.

Live in the moment

It’s easy to get anxious about the future or stressed about the past. Instead, take a moment to appreciate what you have and how great you are – you have every reason to love yourself!

Take care of yourself

Self-care is sometimes seen as selfish – but this is completely wrong. Self-care is necessary to be happy, and it will make you feel much better about yourself.

Check your social circle

Having negative or critical friends can really harm yourself-esteem. Check your circle and limit your time with anyone that’s not loving and supportive.

Focus on being healthy

Feeling physically healthy can really boost your mental health. Make sure you eat a balanced diet but don’t restrict yourself too much – it’s okay to have treats!

Be positive about your body

If your self-esteem depends on having an “ideal body”, you need to start being more accepting. No matter what your body looks like, stop trying to reach impossible beauty standards.

Find a hobby you enjoy

Finding a new hobby you enjoy can make you so much happier. It could be dance, swimming, crafts, or something else – as long as you have fun!

Forget about past mistakes

Reflecting on the past and your old mistakes can help you to learn and grow. But, if you’re still obsessing over your mistakes, it’s time to let it go and move on.

Get out of your comfort zone

Doing things that are out of your comfort zone can boost your self-esteem and give you a more positive outlook on life. Next time you get the opportunity to try something new, say yes!

Learn to say no

If you find yourself doing too much for people, it can be damaging. Loving yourself means losing the urge to please people and saying no when you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Think about your achievements

You can start loving yourself more by thinking about all your accomplishments. It’s easy to get wrapped up in the negative, making it easy to forget all the positive things you’ve achieved.

Make a vision board

Getting excited about the future is an awesome way to love yourself more. It can help you get motivated to achieve the things you want and to build your dream life.

Commit to daily mindfulness

Mindfulness can make a big difference to your mood and attitude. Even just 5-10 minutes every day focusing on breathing and focusing can help you feel more positive.

Don’t be afraid to ask for help

If your self-worth is linked to what you do for others, it’s important to recognize that it’s also important to accept help from others so you can take care of yourself properly.

7 Types of Friends You MUST Unfriend

Having good friends can make your life so much better. They can be great allies and provide you with support, help, and advice. It’s amazing to have friends you can count on!

But, there are some toxic types of friends. Having these types in your circle can make you feel down. The sooner you unfriend these types, the better you will feel.

So, here are the types of friends you should let go of:

1. Negative friends

Do you have any friends that are always complaining and bringing negativity? It’s okay to complain sometimes, but people that have a pessimistic outlook on life can drain your energy.

Whenever you bring up good news, they find a problem with it. This can suck the happiness out of you, so it’s totally fine to unfriend them to avoid getting dragged down.

2. Self-centered friends

This type of friend thinks that the whole world should revolve around them. They only agree to do things when it suits them, and they’re normally unwilling to return any favors.

Unless they are benefiting from something, they’ll probably avoid it. This type of friend should be avoided – even if you do loads for them, they’ll always avoid doing things for you.

3. Unavailable friends

Of course, everyone is busy. A lot of friends don’t get to hang out as much as they’d like. But, it’s important to make the effort to spend time together.

Unavailable friends are the types of friends that are always too busy, and if you do make plans with them, they usually cancel – sometimes at the very last minute.

4. Competitive friends

Another type of friend you should avoid is really competitive ones. Real friends want you to succeed and will support you no matter what.

Friends that are always trying to compete with you will always be trying to do better than you to make themselves feel good. Make sure you protect yourself by unfriending them!

5. Friends that use you

Friends that use you to get things they want are really selfish. They might expect you to pay for everything on a night out, or drive them around everywhere.

These types of friends rarely do anything unless it’s a benefit to them, and this makes the friendship very one-sided – so it’s best to limit contact with them.

6. Two-faced friends

If someone’s being two-faced, they’re not a true friend. They might smile and act friendly, then make fun of you to others or talk about you behind your back.

Whether they’re telling people you don’t deserve a promotion or gossiping about your love life, you need to cut these types of friends out of your life as quickly as possible!

7. Jealous friends

Having a jealous friend can destroy your self-esteem. They will always be pointing out your flaws, and this is because they’re insecure and jealous of you.

With these types of friends, everytime something goes well in your life, envy takes over. Make sure you look out for these people so you can unfriend them.

How to Stay Fit & Healthy Even if You Are Lazy

Are you interested in stepping up your fitness game but don’t have a lot of time and energy to invest? Creating a new fitness routine can be confusing and draining, but it doesn’t have to be! If you’re feeling lazy, and you don’t have a lot of time, we’ve curated a list with our top 5 tips for you to get started on your health journey today!

1. Try an at-home workout!

From yoga to Zumba, a huge variety of at-home workouts popped up during the pandemic, and they’re the perfect replacement for those who don’t want to go to the gym. If you don’t know where to start, you can search for individual virtual events on Eventbrite, or subscribe to an online workout library and play workout videos on demand.

2. Get more sleep

While easier said than done, getting at least eight hours of sleep a night can have great health benefits, including increased attention span, energy, reduced stress, and heightened immunity. A good night’s sleep also helps us to navigate the day and overcome challenges, while maintaining more control over our mood and actions. If you are struggling to get a good night’s sleep, a few basic ideas you can try are reducing all screens and bright lights one to three hours before bed, reading or journaling before bed, trying lavender or chamomile tea and scents, and making sure to get some time outdoors in the sun each morning when you wake up.

3. Take 5-10 minute exercise breaks

If you work remotely, consider taking short 5-10 minute breaks throughout the day to stretch or do other short exercises instead of staying seated at your desk for hours. Even if you don’t work remotely, you can still practice this by pairing exercise with a typically static activity. A few examples are stretching in the shower and doing squats or other exercises while watching tv (another favorite: watching tv as you clean your room or put laundry away).

4. “Take the stairs”

While suggesting that you take the stairs is a total cliche, it is really valuable to try to look for healthier swaps to your normal routine. For example, if you usually Uber home from work, but it’s possible to walk or take the bus, try to switch it up sometimes to get your body moving a little more. You can also try going for a short walk during your lunch break and swapping out an abundance of junk food for a moderation of different types of food, including vegetables and fruits.

5. Pair new changes with old habits

It can be difficult to follow through with a new fitness routine, but you’ve got this! When making any of these changes, just keep in mind that it’s best not to try to make too many changes at one time. Try pairing each change with a preexisting habit because research suggests this makes it easier to remember and follow through.

And remember, be patient with yourself! Change doesn’t happen overnight, so it’s totally natural to fall back into old habits or forget new commitments. The important thing is making a commitment to your health goals and trying your best to follow through. What do you think of these tips? Leave a comment below and let us know!

5 Creative Ways to Stay Connected in a Long Distance Relationship

Long-distance relationships can sometimes make it difficult to feel connected–especially when there’s no defined end in sight. While they can get a bad reputation, long-distance relationships often provide unique opportunities for growing a strong, lasting connection and can be fun and healthy. If you have been feeling disconnected from your partner, try switching things up and testing out different methods of creating shared experiences. Not sure where to begin? We’ve got you covered. Here are 5 creative ways to level up your connection in a long-distance relationship.

1. Have a cooking date

During the pandemic, virtual cooking dates became popular for their ability to create both space for open conversation and fun memories together. Whether you both cook the same thing and then compare the end result, or you just want to cook at the same time and then eat together, this is a great way to bond and be mindful together. It’s especially fun when you video chat during. Tip: Try creating something new together, or something a little challenging.

2. Virtual Airbnb Experiences

Everyone’s heard of the popular house-sharing site Airbnb, but did you know that the platform also hosts “experiences,” including both physical and online experiences? There is a wide variety of online activities offered, from trivia to cooking classes, dancing lessons, and more!

3. Virtual Book Club

Another fun way to continue building shared experiences is to read the same book! Try switching off every other month on who chooses a book and then meet up after you have both been able to finish it. If you struggle to keep organized, it helps to agree on a core structure in advance, like what book and date you will choose so that both people have plenty of time to plan and read.

4. Order Surprise Takeout

If you liked the idea of a cooking date, but you or your partner doesn’t have the time or energy to make food from scratch, consider ordering some surprise takeout, just for fun! Alternatively, you could send them dessert, or another thoughtful gift. It’s really the excitement from a thoughtful surprise that counts here!

5. Create a playlist together

If you or your partner loves listening to music, consider creating a shared playlist on Spotify or another streaming platform to listen to when you’re missing each other. Either both people can contribute, or you can make one as a fun gift for your partner so they know you’re thinking about them.

6. Stream a movie together

Another popular activity during the pandemic has been virtual movie nights! You can choose a movie together and gather some snacks, while you stream a movie together and video chat. There are a variety of streaming platforms to do this over, such as Zoom, Netflix Party, HosuseParty, or you can just video chat and stream separately.

There are lots of ways to connect within a long-distance relationship, and switching up your routine in a relationship can be a fun way to bond. Test out anything on the list that looks interesting to you, and let us know how it goes in the comment section!

How to Make a Small Bedroom Look Bigger

Whether you’re trying to save money or simply optimizing your space, many of us are sleeping in teeny tiny bedrooms each night. But having a small bedroom doesn’t mean you have to feel cramped!

With a few simple tricks, you can maximize your space and trick yourself into thinking you’ve got the biggest bedroom on the block. Try these tips to make your small bedroom look larger.

Think Vertically

Chances are, you have a lot of unused real estate in the upper half of your bedroom. From picture frames to shelving units to floor-length mirrors, there’s a lot of features you can add to your room to fill this empty space. Even a tall headboard can trick you into thinking your room is larger than it actually is.

Embrace Furniture on Legs

A lot of midcentury modern furniture rests on small, tapered legs, which allows you to see more of your floor under your furniture. Whether it’s your bed frame, your nightstand, or a desk or side table, showcasing the floor underneath your furniture creates an illusion of depth which makes your room feel bigger.

You could take this a step further and actually loft your bed to really maximize your space. Just try not to make it feel too much like a dorm room!

Keep it Bright

Light-colored walls and decor help your room look more bright, which makes it feel more spacious. Don’t feel pressured to keep everything white if that’s not your style, but avoid mixing too many different colors (especially darker tones) or bold prints, since this will make your room feel more cluttered.

Drop the Drapes

If your room gets any natural light, soak it up! Getting rid of curtains or drapes can help to enhance the brightness of your room. If you’re worried about privacy, try using thin drapes or light-colored curtains that blend into your wall.

Get a Floor-Length Mirror

Mirrors provide an optical illusion that tricks your brain into thinking you actually have a bigger room. Floor length mirrors work better than small ones, since they reflect more of your room. Place your mirror near your window for maximum effect—this enhances both the brightness and depth of your space!

Small Wallpaper Prints or Striped Wallpaper

If you decorate with wallpaper, choose paper with small prints or vertical stripes. Large prints will dwarf your room and make it feel even smaller. Vertical stripes will draw your eyes towards the high ceilings instead of to your cluttered floor space.

Ghost It

Translucent desks or chairs (sometimes called ghost furniture) take up space without really looking like they take up space. Because they’re translucent, your eyes slide right past them when scanning the room. Not only are they stylish, but they open up your small bedroom and make it feel much larger.

Keep It Clean

This goes without being said, but if your floor is cluttered with clothes or magazines, your space is going to feel smaller. You’re a grown up—keep it clean!

Small spaces don’t have to be bare to feel big. By thoughtfully maximizing your living space and using a few simple tips to trick your eyes, your small bedroom can feel spacious while still looking, well, lived in!

How to Throw an Epic House Party

Throwing your first house party is kind of a lot of pressure. If the conversation is awkward, the food is cold, or the music is boring, people might not show up to the next one! Follow these tips to throw a house party everyone will enjoy.

Be Thoughtful about the Guest List

A lot of people show up to a house party hoping to meet that “special someone,” which makes your party a great chance to introduce your high school friends to your work friends or that bartender you’ve been crushing on. Nobody wants to go to a party that’s only with their coworkers, right?

When it comes to planning the guest list, you want to thread the needle between inviting people that know everyone and people that don’t know anyone. If you invite too many people whose only common friend is you, then you’ll be stuck introducing people all night and worrying about how awkward everyone must feel.

Let Your Neighbors Know

It’s a good idea to put your neighbors on notice if you’re planning on having loud music late into the evening. You don’t want the grump from down the hall calling the cops because your friend who thinks nothing is a “big deal” parked over the curb in front of the fire hydrant.

Think of this as a great opportunity to meet that precious old lady next door or the cute guy on the first floor. You can even invite them to the party!

Lock Your Roommates’ Doors

Once people start drinking, all bets are off. Don’t expect that your instruction to stay out of your home office while your friends were sober will be remembered once they’re a few drinks in. If there’s anywhere you don’t want people hanging out, getting friendly, or puking, lock the doors. It will save you some grumpy roommates and some icky cleaning up in the middle of the night.

Prep People-Pleasing Booze and Food

People come to a party ready to munch some serious snacks. But nobody wants to be holed up around the dinner table when they’re trying to mingle! Whip up some bite-sized snacks that your friends can fill up with while also staying social. And pro tip: your vegan and vegetarian friends need more than just a veggie tray!

When it comes to drinks, setting out a few six-packs just seems lazy. Grab a mix of beer, wine (red and white, preferably!), and some mixed drinks. To be extra thoughtful, make a house mocktail for your non-drinking friends too!

Set the Mood with a Perfect Playlist

Your house party isn’t prom, but when it comes to the music, you do kind of need a theme. Make a playlist (or find one online!) of upbeat hits that your friends will enjoy. You don’t want to just put your Spotify history on shuffle and let ACDC play after Taylor Swift. Be intentional, but don’t stress about it too much—just stick to the same general era and genre.

Plan Games You’d Actually Like To Play

Most of us can only small talk for so long. Make sure your friends who are more introverted have something stimulating to do once the chatter starts to die down, or you’ll have people leaving your party before it’s even gotten started.

Think about what your friends are into, and provide a mix of different options. Keeping a deck of cards handy is always a good idea; for some groups, drinking games or board games are more their vibe. Whatever you do, don’t turn on the TV. It’s impossible to really carry a conversation while the TV is on, and while your friends might stay, they won’t enjoy doing the same thing at your “party” that they could be doing at home.

Are you ready to act as matchmaker, bartender, DJ, and hostess of the best house party ever? These 6 tips will have you throwing a party your friends will never forget.

Tips to Help You Fall Asleep Fast

Sleep troubles got you…up? For people who struggle to fall asleep at night, crisp linen sheets and dim lights are anything but relaxing.

Sleep struggles compound upon one another—if you struggle to fall asleep, then you become anxious about falling asleep, which makes it harder to get the zzz’s you need. Next time you’re laying in bed staring at the ceiling, try one of these tips to help you fall asleep in minutes.

Tip #1: Check Out a Tried-and-True Method

There are a couple different tactics recommended by doctors for people struggling with clinical insomnia. While these methods may take a while to perfect, over time they can help you fall asleep in 2 minutes or less.

The Military Method

The military method was developed by the U.S. Navy to help pilots fall asleep even when sitting up. To start, relax your entire face. Let the relaxation slip down your body from your shoulders, to your chest, down your legs.

Once you’re relaxed, visualize a relaxing scene and imagine being there. If you haven’t fallen asleep yet, think the words “don’t think” to yourself over and over again. Within 10 seconds you should be sleeping!

The 4-7-8 Method

The 4-7-8 method is based on yoga techniques. It’s designed to help calm anxiety, so you can fall asleep fast. Start by relaxing your tongue behind your front teeth on the roof of your mouth. Breathe out through your mouth until your lungs are empty. Breathe in through your nose for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 7, and exhale for 8.

Repeat the process at least 4 times to enter a state of calm.

Progressive Muscle Relaxation

Progressive muscle relaxation isn’t exactly what it sounds like. Yes, you do relax your muscles, but you tense them first before progressively releasing the tension.

Starting with your eyebrows, tense the muscles for 5 seconds, then relax and wait 10 seconds. Do the same with your mouth, eyes, neck, arms, chest, thighs, and feet.

Tip #2: Practice Relaxation Visualization

Think of a calm place. Picture the scenery as well as how you feel in that place. Focus on your feelings and you’ll find yourself nodding off in no time.

Tip #3: Tell Yourself To Stay Awake

Turns out we all have a bit of a rebellious streak! Try laying in bed and telling yourself you have to stay awake. In spite of yourself, you’ll fall asleep!

Tip #4: Do Some Gentle Yoga

Moving through a few yoga poses before bed can calm your brain and relax your muscles. Choose 4–5 gentle poses, like child’s pose or happy baby, and flow through them for 10–15 minutes before bedtime.

Tip #5: Take a Warm Shower

There’s nothing like a warm shower or bath to relax your mind and muscles before bed. Try not to think about the day, just focus on experiencing the warm water relaxing your body.

Tip #6: Plug in a White Noise Machine

If traffic or other nighttime noises are keeping you up, plug in a white noise machine or a fan for a quiet, calming hum. A fan can also help keep you cool overnight, since a warm bed can actually keep you up instead of helping you rest.

Tip #7: Turn Your Phone Off

An hour before bed, turn your phone off or put it away. The visual stimulation from blue light as well as the mental stimulation of social media, email, or texting with friends can keep you up.

Tip #8: Meditate

Don’t let this tip intimidate you—meditation could be as simple as writing a page in a journal or slowly breathing in and out with your eyes closed for a minute or two. Like yoga, meditation helps to decrease anxiety and gives your mind freedom from the stressors of the day.

If you’re still awake at the end of all this talk about calming scenery and deep breathing techniques, then you really must have some sleep struggles! Try one (or several!) of these proven methods next time your thoughts are keeping you up to help you fall asleep fast.

Tip #9: Make sure your bed is comfortable

Investing in a comfortable bed is another way to fall asleep faster and improve the quality of your sleep. Make sure you buy a supportive mattress and pillows, and the right bedding.

Cotton bedding is the best option if you want to stay cool, as it’s breathable and draws moisture away from the body. Or, if you’re prone to feeling cold, a warmer option like wool is better.

Tip #10: Cut back on caffeine and alcohol

If you’re struggling to fall asleep, it might be because you’re consuming too much caffeine or alcohol – especially if you’re having them later in the evening.

It’s best to avoid caffeine for about four hours before going to bed, as it’s a stimulant that can disrupt your sleep patterns and make you feel more awake.

Alcohol can also have an adverse effect, as it can make you feel restless or induce sweating or nausea, and this can make it harder to fall asleep.

How to Find Motivation to Exercise

We all know the benefits of exercise—weight loss, increased energy, and decreased stress, to name a few—but staying motivated to stick with it can feel impossible. How do we make time for exercise without dreading it every day? Try these tips to maintain your motivation to exercise.

Set Goals

For some people, setting goals (and watching yourself achieve them!) is really motivating. It can be something as small as walking 20 minutes a day or getting up and stretching before work 5 times a week. Start with something that’s measurable and achievable. Once you’ve grown comfortable with your initial goal, consider setting a new, slightly more difficult one.

Don’t put pressure on yourself to constantly be raising the stakes—this can cause you to get burned out. Experts recommend at least 150 minutes of moderate activity per week, so try and build up to at least that much weekly exercise.

Play a Sport

When you were a kid, you probably never really thought about exercise. That’s because you got all the exercise you needed by playing! Turns out chasing someone during tag on the playground and taking ballet class in the evenings was for more than just fun.

If sports are still your jam, consider joining an adult league to spice up your exercise routine. Find ways to work out that don’t feel like exercise—maybe you can get together with some friends and shoot hoops a few times a week or join a recreational softball league.

Make Exercise Part of Your Routine

If you think of exercise as an optional part of the day, it’s easy to skip it when you feel tired, busy, or just plain unmotivated. But what if it was as important a part of your day as eating breakfast or going to work?

Exercise is essential to a healthy lifestyle, so let’s start treating it as essential. Find a time during the day when you can go for a walk or swing by the gym. Remember, 150 minutes a week (or 20–30 minutes a day) is all you need!

Invite Friends

What if exercise could become a time to socialize with friends? If you workout with others, whether you’re going for a bike ride or playing pickleball, you hit two birds with one stone. Exercising with friends also builds accountability, since your friends are depending on you to keep your commitments.

Don’t Be Rigid

It’s important to build exercise into your routine, but it’s equally important to allow for flexibility. Like it or not, things are going to come up. For some people, one slip up in their routine due to sickness or parent teacher conferences can derail their whole exercise regimen.

Instead, focus on getting back on track as soon as possible. Recognize that missing one or two workouts isn’t going to set you back to the beginning, but it’s also not going to get you to your goals as quickly. Focus on the end goal, and you’ll find the motivation to get going again.

Think of it as “Me” Time

There’s a lot you can do while exercising, depending on how you do it—you can talk on the phone, read, watch TV, or listen to music or a podcast, for example. What’s your guilty pleasure, and how can you indulge in it while exercising?

In one study, people who were given a free, page-turning audiobook and only allowed to listen to it at the gym exercised 51% more often than others. Thinking about exercise as your chance to indulge in “me” time instead of as a chore can help turn it into something you actually look forward to doing!

Finding motivation to exercise isn’t easy, and we’ll all struggle with it at some point. By recognizing it and adapting our routines, we can maintain a healthy lifestyle.

5 Reasons Your Kids Don’t Talk to You

Have you been feeling disconnected from your children recently? Do you feel like they don’t confide in you, or that they are sometimes lying to you? If you are struggling to get your child to open up to you, check out our top 5 reasons why your kids don’t talk to you!

1. They feel fundamentally invalidated, rejected, or ignored

When a child feels that their essence is fundamentally ignored, invalidated, or rejected, they often start to bottle up what they are feeling or thinking. This can be very harmful to a relationship and is unlikely to disappear with time. If you find a child, at any age, routinely avoiding talking about their emotions or experiences with you, consider if it’s possible you might be dismissing or invalidating their feelings or experiences subconsciously.

2. You criticize important dreams or goals

While you don’t have to indulge a child in every fantasy they can create, unnecessary dismissal or criticism of goals, dreams, or thoughts is likely to cause a child to close off. We have all had “crazy” dreams at one time, and more often than not, we grow out of them on our own anyway. Allow your child to have their own thoughts and goals in life, and they are more likely to confide in you about what’s important to them.

3. You joke about how “ungrateful” or “lazy” they are

While there’s nothing wrong with speaking about your history, or trying to teach your children about your values, frequent comments that start with, “Back in my day,” or, “When I was your age…” might cause your kid to feel judged, which could cause them to shut down, harming your relationship in the long term. Likewise, in almost every scenario, disparaging your kids for being ungrateful, soft, weak etc. even as a joke does more harm than good.

4. They feel pressure to perform

Does your child feel pressured to perform as if everything is fine in order to feel loved or accepted in an area of their life? When kids feel pressure to be strong, they will often hide what they truly think or feel, and might avoid having real conversations with you as time goes on. Try to emphasize that it’s okay to make mistakes and that failing is a part of life. Emphasize and model unconditional love.

5. They need a space to open up

If you are craving more connection and conversation with your kids, it’s possible they are too, and they just don’t know where to start. Try creating at least a few times a month for you to bond with your child in a fun way. You could try cooking together, doing crafts, going on a day trip, watching a movie, or anything else fun that you think your child will enjoy.

Regardless of past mistakes or betrayals, a willingness to change and an apology can go a long way with children. It’s never too late to start making changes, so you can have a healthy and meaningful connection.

Ways to Help Kids Manage Fear and Be Less Anxious

Is your child experiencing anxiety? Fear and anxiety are very common in children and adults of all ages and can be managed through a variety of methods, from behavioral shifts to medicine. Today we’re going to give you our top tips on how to guide your child through mild to moderate anxiety.

Understand and validate their anxiety

It’s easy to dismiss a child’s expressions of anxiety as an overreaction or say they’re upset for no reason. You might even say something like, “Try being an adult. Then you’ll know what actual problems are.” Try to understand that for a child, who is unable to self-regulate, their fears and anxiety are very real. Try to ask questions in a calm, non-judgmental way, and express that you will be there to support them as they work through their fear. Avoid trying to eliminate or solve the problem yourself as this might work in the short term but doesn’t do your child any favors in the long term when they are dealing with anxiety or problems as an adult. Instead, work with your child to create a plan to cope ahead for when they’re feeling anxious.

Plan and cope ahead

A good goal is to guide your child to learn healthy ways to cope with anxiety and fear. A few examples might be taking deep breaths, a hug, or taking a moment away from the situation that is causing anxiety until they are able to calm down. Work with your child to understand these methods while they are feeling calm and reinforce them often because that will be a lot more effective than when your child is anxious. At first, you will have to guide these coping skills, but the goal is for your child to learn to self-regulate and use these tools without your prompting.

Create a bedtime routine

Bedtime can be stressful, especially for younger kids. Try to create clear expectations and routines to help develop a sense of stability and security. You might spend a few minutes reading together or sing a special nighttime song, for example. Sleep experts recommend avoiding screens or bright lights for at least 1-3 hours beforehand for the best results. When children are able to get the right amount of sleep, this can really improve their ability to self-regulate and can make managing anxiety throughout the day much easier.

Encourage the process, not results

Most of us are programmed to say things such as, “Great job,” “Wow, that’s a pretty painting,” or, “You won the game! You’re so good,” without even thinking. Research shows that praising results can actually cause children to become less interested in the actual process, and instead become fixated on receiving more praise. What does this have to do with anxiety? When children feel pressure to succeed, they might procrastinate or experience anxiety around being perfect. Instead, try to encourage the effort your child makes and help them accept that failure is a part of the process. For example, “What are you painting,” “Wow, you won the game? How did that feel?” etc.

Do you agree with our tips? Are there any that you would add? Leave a comment below!

These tips were created to manage mild to moderate anxiety, and might not be sufficient for a child experiencing severe anxiety or mental illness. If after adopting these tools your child’s anxiety does not improve, or if you have specific concerns, consult a specialist, such as a psychologist or your child’s doctor.

Please note: if your child experiences abrupt changes in emotions or personality, such as becoming extremely withdrawn for seemingly no reason, it might be necessary to consult a specialist to ensure healthy development and assess possible trauma.